The gym

Have been hitting it a lot lately. As a result, my arms are sore - my back feels better - and my cardio tolerance is hugely improving. Why do I stop going at all? Oh yeah - back to school, sick kids, home improvement, etc. Anyway - still love my Urban Active at Bakery Square.

Project re-organization is going well (aside from the mysterious blow-up pool toy on our deck, we are looking more neat and proper). Still all-consuming, however. Writing / editing project also time-consuming. Googled slow cooker roast recipes and top mommy blogs this morning. I have arrived at "that place" - no time - lots of ideas. Wishing you all well today. Miss you. What have you all googled lately?

A small list of indulgences

1. My new haircut and warm "I don't have bland hair" highlights - came complete with hours of "me time" (I took that highly coveted time to read Vogue, Vanity Fair, Elle - ad nauseum) followed by a decadent lunch at Paris 66 with hubby.

2. Coffee (just bought a new DeLonghi espresso maker -reasonably priced so... not a true indulgence at all... just braggin' about my frugality again ;-).

3. Ate two (count them - 2!!!!) 365 degree Whole Foods brand frozen coconut bars right in a row (4 grams of fat each - high five - you could take that either way - I realize....) AND allowed myself 15 min with the neck massager while the kids occupied themselves.

4. Took kiddos to Chick-Fil-A where I allowed myself some tasty strips as well - dipped them in ketchup with my little ones - drank Coke - the whole bit - then sat and read and chatted with another mother while they whooped it up in the play area.

5. The gym - the gym, the gym, the gym!!!! Love it. OH - and.... on the way there... or while there running on treadmill (OK - sometimes I "fast walk" on aforementioned treadmill), listening to bands that I am barely aware of, but... sound tres 80s to me so ignite love at first listen - like Japandroids, Yacht and their cover of X's Nausea, Whitest Boys You Know and the Fred Failke Remix, the Wavves .....

In closing, speaking of music..... Are you looking for something for your kids that you might be able to stand too? Do you want to participate in a good cause? If so, then go here for information on how to do that - my friend and fellow blogger, Angry Baker, can push it much better than I can - complete with requisite urls, etc.

Photos: The haircut, my coffee area and beloved french press, and my new bicep - in profile ;-).

Purpose? And tattoos?

As you all know, this has been a BIG question with me lately. Big one. Like ... all-consuming big one. I sit in my house this am - in my funky flannels and my tacky purple skull and crossbones shirt - poking at my cherry clafoutis, which didn't set properly but tastes OK (see recipe - earlier post)and does so because hubby brought me the world's tastiest cherries from Whole Foods the other night (attempting to encourage something that interests me, I think :-) - gazing sadly at my dead coffeemaker and sulkily drinking my sub-par English breakfast tea (I'm low on tea bags too - and made this batch too weak - ugh - my sweet Dad bought me that coffeemaker complete with cappuccino capabilities back when my recently departed ex had taken the one my friends had given me, and my Dad noticed that it made me sad :-) - sniff - those days are gone) - and.... I'm trying to figure out JUST what it is that I do well.

This morning, as hubby was off to work and I was.... well... still gazing about the kitchen, he attempted to cheer me up, saying, "You take care of this house of 6 so well - I mean... um... look... everything in its place... clean... kids happy." And... I can't help but let my mind wander to the fact that.... well - they won't be happy for long; they'll fight (and props to Olivia for helping a great deal yesterday with the chaos as well as breaking up a particularly nasty and fierce knockdown / drag-out on the landing this am as I attempted a shower with no luck). And... this laundry, dusting, vacuuming thing? Boring. And guess what's for dinner AGAIN tonight? Chicken and mashed potatoes and glazed carrots and... what's that? You're losing interest? Drifting a bit? Yeah.... me too.

So ... good news for hubby - a web site that he worked on was randomly chosen by Crain's Business as one of their top 10 for 2010. He is being interviewed on Tuesday along with his content person and account manager (and, btw, I "Freudingly" typed "we worked on..." instead of "he worked on..." earlier before correcting - See, I often feel these PR chicks are doing my job - we did, after all, work together for years.... YEARS!). He also has little kid soccer draft this evening - beers after with his coaching friends.... Olivia has a birthday dinner with a friend (not to mention a pool party hosted by one of her camp friends at her house in Sewickley tomorrow night - a community I highly covet - wish I would have known Pittsburgh better when I first moved here). I am doing nothing - literally nothing. I had a few tentative plans fall through for the weekend - plus have not scheduled a hair appointment yet and now hubby wants to take the boys fishing tomorrow. All good. I'll find something.

I'm feeling restless, I think. My arms are sore from a really good workout yesterday (yeah - I kicked my own ass - thinking about doing it again today - one positive that occurs when I get bored is my urge to exercise more... so... gotta work that, I think ;-), and.... I have to say... last evening .... as I mixed and baked and Lil sat on the floor and cut (and ate) little orange cherry tomatoes with her plastic IKEA knife and we unpacked our CSA basket and I could hear my boys and the neighbors playing in the "clubhouse" through the screen door - that whole laughter on the air bit - being called into dinner - just great retro "play in the neighborhood" stuff (hi, free rangers :-), life was GOOD - like goooooood.

Now, I can't say that I didn't have a restless moment yesterday. In fact, I had a big one. On our way to the "concussion test" at Oakland Catholic (and, no, they don't smack them in the head and then ask a series of questions - we know they don't - we asked ;-) with my Olivia and her two friends, Molly and Caroline, in the car.... ANOTHER friend texted a photo of her cartilege piercing from a tattoo parlor on the Southside (hi, Olivia B). Now... I have to digress a bit.... A few weeks before, when this friend expressed her desire to have this piercing, my Olivia showed her my ear - two holes through the cartilege - way up high, and.... I HAD to tell her the equivalent of our parents "walked 10 miles in the snow to school" story - my piercing story. How I got it done like at the mall - and it was awful and didn't work - and I had pain and yukiness - and then..... my friend got another tattoo and I went along and this super cool piercing artist said to me, "I can fix that", and he did - with a big long hollow needle - left it in - told me to keep a certain kind of jewelry in it, etc. Another digression..... I DID develop a little crush on him (remember that, mina? ;-), BUT he did fix it. I let it close when EVERYONE started to pierce EVERYTHING. Now, however, I often gaze longingly at tattoos. Cool ones - like the bright, pastel-y, flowery sleeves that look so great on some people (I'm looking at you, Jamie, on last season's Top Chef). Immediately, I engaged poor Molly in a conversation about tattoos (hey - she was willing :-) - and Kat Von D and LA Ink (oh Kat, do you remember the days after Lil was born in the hospital and I watched you on TLC all night? - limited viewing there - but I got sucked in - like a soap opera). Anyway, I did get this urge to floor it - and speed my minivan to the Southside to check out the piercing and to peruse tattoos. I didn't. I went straight to the "concussion test" :-).

So .... what's up with y'all today? I found this cereal - Cascadian Farm (Kids), organic, Fruitful O's - as we shopped organics in the Market District at Giant Eagle yesterday ... whole grain, sweetened with fruit juice AND iron-fortified. Good news as Milo needs a follow up blood test for his iron saturation problem in the next few days, and HE was the one who picked it out - go figure. Also - I made my flu shot appointments (poor Milo needs the shot as he was admitted to the hospital for Croup last year - the others, including my two year old, can do the mist). They are NOT doing separate flu and H1N1 this year, so that's good. Also, I go to a busy practice, and they are scheduling two dates in Sept. They left their message for me the other day, but... the appointments aren't even close to filling up yet - also good news. So - if you are flu shot people, gotta think about getting that scheduled already.

Photos: Yep - more that my kids took of me...;-).

Gotta go - planning to throw the Wii into the backyard for good today :-), but... legos are grabbing some interest now, and... Lil is full of "secrets" today, whispered in my ear (and totally enamored of her fancy new hair clips - we should all take a lesson on the bright side from Lil :-), so.... something good is a brewin'..... and I will meditate on that as I head off to re-wash the kitchen floor, bleach a load of whites and Olivia's grease-stained shorts, fill out some more school paperwork and clean out the produce drawers in the fridge. Good times.

No more excuses.

I have this tendency to evaluate my appearance, my body, my style, etc. very harshly. I intensely dislike photos of myself and I am constantly striving to take at least one "pretty" one so my kids will remember me when I was young as fun and attractive (and this is anywhere - if I'm baking cookies and notice my hair looks good, I may prompt hubby to snap one - or if we're out and I feel like I actually like what I have on, I may ask for another quick candid - usually one of my eyes looks bigger than the other - you can see my gray streaked ugly ash brown roots or I have yet another breakout - Ooooo - worse, I look fat .... AGAIN). Vain? No. Silly? Probably. Deluded? Yes.

And... by deluded - I mean on both ends. There are days that I think I look fabulous and... in hindsight - I wonder how I did not manage to embarass Olivia - repulse hubby and / or make my little ones laugh at me. Other times, I look at a photo from just a few years ago when I was lamenting a bad haircut, feeling chubby and hating my outfit, AND... oddly.... now I think I look great - and so does hubby - and Olivia - and my Mom (now that's sayin' something).

I've been many things - lipsticked, dressed up dancer in my high-heeled Frye boots by day - my appropriately ripped up sweats and leg warmers by night - ballet bun and / or long, loose curls - nails were always done - eye shadow always 80s funky - and the jewelry - oh the rings and ear piercings... 7 total. I then went punk - hair long in the front, shaved in the back a la skate punk style (and skating those empty swimming pools and long, flat city steps WAS fun, wasn't it? As were the hardcore shows - alternative dance nights with my "Waver" friends....) - army jackets - pegged jeans - converse sneaks - black everything - shirts, skinny skirts, baggy sweats - Oh - and combat boots and Doc Martens (I still take my old buckled Docs out now and then and caress and care for them :-). I even entered a crunchy, hippy, granola stage - living at the oceanfront, I was all long, straight, sunstreaked hair - no makeup - sunglasses - flip flops - bells and braided bracelets on my ankles - back pack - hiking shorts (and, yes, I hiked and ran during this time - a 5K - an 8K - one scary Maine rock climbing trip - another scary white water adventure in WVA) - a little fairy wish bell around my neck - crystals.... In fact, I sometimes freak a little - thinking people still see me as the bohemian, gypsy type, and... I want a little more from my style than that. By contrast, those who knew me as the professional, remember a designer obsessed chick with short, choppy hair - chunky silver jewelry - lots of boots and heels - ALWAYS solid colors (no prints here), and... that's not really me either (I blame the ad, pr and marketing industry).

Now? I don't know. I suspect I may be all of those things. I wear old punk rock t-shirts to work out at the gym. For simplicity, I usually just grow my hair long - but end up hacking at my bangs or my layers myself - having expensive colorists add color that I end up hating. I do wear flip flops, long skirts and tie dyes in the summer - usually no make up - AND in the winter, I'm all scrunchy UGGS, clingy skirts or yoga pants, puffy jackets and funky scarves with bright lipstick and sunglasses. I am, admittedly, a little boring. Every now and then, I buy a cool pair of earrings that my long, stringy hair hides or I buy a new pair of shoes that I end up never wearing. I usually blame time - even lack of interest (house and kids making me crazy), but... I'm finding that I have no excuses.

I hang with some people at the pool who do their workout and show up, kids in tow, hair pushed back - requisite yoga pants or Athleta workout skirts over their faded bathing suits and they work it and they look good. I went to drop my Olivia at a friend's house to babysit the other night, and "the dad" showed up at the front door looking nothing like a dad but more like a teenager with his baseball hat on backwards - long baggy b-ball shorts on - bare feet. Could I pull that off? No. Can all these cute boys - my hubby included - who wear it all with confidence and bravado pull it off? Yes. My neighbor just shaved her head and it looks fabulous, so... there goes my "I can't have style because nothing is low maintenance" excuse (and, yes, M, I am shaking my fist at you right now - I know you're out picking peaches, but I'm shaking it - you just can't see me ;-). Another friend just dropped over 20 pounds in LESS THAN a summer, so.... again.... what's my excuse? I eat what the kids do.... blah blah blah - she has a kindergartner too!

I'm beginning to wonder if maybe confidence is what it takes to pull anything off AND that's precisely what I need to work on. Plus - I do need to get my hair cut every now and then - buy myself a lipstick or a shirt. I'm into this self-deprivation thing right now, and it is just NOT working for me.

Photos: Easter. A perfect example of what I mean. We took tons of photos. In each one, I look horrible for varying reasons. With Olivia - eyes closed (though, I am in heels - she in flats - so I look tall - I can't stand it when I look like a troll with all these middle school girls towering over me). With Lil - fat. Close up with Lil - fat - and what is UP with my hair?! Group photo... um.... look OK but why is everyone fighting and running from us? I included a "booty shot" - yes, my butt - in the mirror - a "before" photo for my workout progress. Need I say more? I often like the self-portraits that my kids take. I have a "witch" nose and chin, but... these photos look like ME - they capture my essence, I think - good or bad. And, yes - I included one of my famous self-portraits - ugly but I dig it (see my evaluation techniques are rather odd :-). And... finally... the family photo shoot - have said it before, will say it again - I look baaaad - everyone else looks fantastic. I think I tried to hide blemishes with too much make-up - had let someone put a "warm" red tone on my hair, and... well... yuck. Hubby looks cute, though.

OK - so here ya go.... A story here on salmonella and eggs. Just beware - does not seem to affect our region. And... here - what I'm been obsessing on lately.... how NOT to lose your temper (i.e. yell) when kids are acting up (perfect timing on this article - must be some summer angst a brewin' all over - and, on my end, I've already told them all to "shut up" this morning - and, at one time, my Olivia thought that was a swear word to give you ANY idea of how far my parenting skills have deteriorated with the addition of each wild child - and, today, hands shaking, stomach aching, I am LOSIN' IT). And... finally ... same mag - a story on "is your child a public menace?" Hmmm.... wonder who that applies to?

Top Chef tonight.... don't miss it!

Just about everything borrowed today.

Check out the new blog I'm following on my list - a family dinner idea place and beyond, really. Thanks, MW, for that.

Also, for you locals (and, by that, I mean Clevelanders and Pittsburghers), here are some restaurant bargains (thanks, SBC, for that) - Ibiza (Mallorca's tapas bar), Namaste India - others.

Again ... for locals (this time just Pitt), here are some upcoming events at our local Nordstrom. Some worth a look - some not so much.

And, honestly, this has been on my mind lately.... what to wear when I work out (looking like a non-geek does wonders for my self-esteem). Here is what Rachel Zoe says.... so I'm sure it will be "bananas" - "major" - all that ;-).

The Bakery Square Urban Active Fitness is offering a fitness workshop - alongside facility trainers - this Sat, 14 Aug from 6:30 am to 8 am - limit 100 (early risers, obviously) - first 50 will receive the opportunity for a free personal trainer, AND the event is supposedly going to be run by some big names in the fitness industry - though... did not see those announced yet. Might be fun - I'm still thinking on it....

This weekend is the Seven Springs Food and Wine Festival. Probably worth a look - unsure, currently, what the weather will hold for anyone interested.

I'm always prompting you all to join zulily, and... today is no different. Vive la Fete childrens' hand-smocked clothing is featured today - very sweet little Halloween dresses and outfits - with pretty little witches and pumpkins stitched across the chest - very retro - very classic - very cute.

I was made aware of an article on a boy from good old St. Bede. I believe he played in the band that performed at my fundraiser a couple of years there - also his Mom has photographed my daughter for a magazine (a "volunteer" type situation - in the marketing / advertising industry, our kids are often volunteered for such work :-) - this time, she and some of her friends modeled for a friend in need) - and, of course, many of the kids in my daughter's circle are aware of his impending and current success. Anyway, here is that article on this particular "hip hop boy" ;-). Worth a read.

And, speaking of St. Bede.... parents - we got a packet of info a week or so ago - Now - two more to check out, fill out and turn everything in.... mine arrived today. FYI.

And finally - saw this recipe - or a version of it by different names - from 4 different people - 4!!!! - bizarre - last week or so, so.... gave it a try and it is easy and tasty. In a nutshell, here is the recipe (fused from the different ones I was forwarded / happened to see / was given):

Beef Provencal -

1 to 2 pounds cubed beef
Equal parts onion and carrots (one and a half to two cups)
Lots of garlic - one recipe called for 12 cloves - another only 6 - crushed
Olive oil
14 oz diced tomatoes
tbsp tomato paste
1 cup beef broth
1 cup red wine
pinch rosemary
pinch thyme
salt and pepper to taste
pinch allspice or cloves
one bay leaf

Saute crushed garlic in olive oil until fragrant (use deep dutch oven-type pan) - remove and set aside. Saute beef cubes (salt and peppered a bit) until browned - remove and set aside. Pour in red wine - bring to a boil by scraping brown bits from pan. Return garlic and beef to pan - keep in med / high heat. Add carrots, onion then beef stock or broth, tomatoes, tomato paste, rosemary, thyme, more salt and pepper, allspice or cloves and bay leaf - mix well - bring it all to a boil. Cover (I just used foil) - and put the whole pan in the oven to bake at 300 degrees for 2 - 2.5 hours. Remove bay leaf before serving over noodles. This can also, apparently, be done in a slow cooker if you are so inclined.

And, finally, since we're in the kitchen .... Hell's Kitchen and Next Food Network Star have finales this week, and... well... Top Chef is about halfway done..... getting a little more interesting too.

See ya!

Uneventful ... but for some reason I'm still tired.

So ... yesterday, I took the three little ones to the museum. First, we went and got Enzo and Olivia all signed up for the bus (as "ceo of the home", I had to get that done ;-). Last year, I had not done so for Enzo since he only rode home, and... I'm not sure he made the cut-off for birthday (too young), so... avoided that hassle entirely. This year, however, Olivia is switching schools and Enzo is, officially, old enough for kindergarten. It was pain-free at the Woodland Hills Admin office for the schools (in Edgewood, we are Woodland Hills - not City of Pitt) - but if you do need to go,be sure to bring 3 forms of ID - driver's license, mortgage statement, utility bill. Then - off we went to the museum where we checked out the dinosaurs, as usual - then... hit all the animals (no interest in mummies.. hmmm...), saw a lighted exhibit they really liked, looked at the entire Frans Lanting photography exhibit (my kids are wildlife lovers) and did a craft in the Frank Lloyd Wright Falling Water exhibit. Big day. We had packed a little picnic snack and stayed all afternoon.

Of course, as is always the case with me, I started to reminisce about the past - how when it was just me, hubby and Olivia, we would go to the museum often. She went to daycare / preschool at Carriage House in Squirrel Hill, and we knew a lot of people there with kids her age, so ... occasionally, we would meet them, but... mostly, we went alone - did lunch - made a day of it. Back then, the dinosaur exhibit was super cool - throughout the day, they would do these rainstorms and it would get dark and sound like it was raining near the brontos and T-rexes - plus there was a big dinosaur footprint to sit in - fossils to touch - AND, if you went to the snack bar in the middle - right out in the open (and it wasn't the sad, depressing cafeteria it is now - it was a bright little cafe with all sorts of kid junk like burgers and grilled cheese), the kids could play with these interactive space and planet games / screens. I appreciate all the renovations to the Carnegie Museum in the past few years, but I do miss the old, more kid-friendly natural history section. I do love museums. You know, I even remember taking baby Olivia to a children's literature illustration exhibit at the Chrysler Museum of Art in Norfolk, VA when we lived there - alone, we kinda wandered and looked at old Dr.Seuss and other sketches... fun. Is anyone else like me in that you miss the old Carnegie Museum? Maybe it IS just me .... getting "sappy"...

Anyway - our day rounded out with a quick trip to the store for dinner items (just grilled some hot dogs), a stop to pick up our CSA basket and a late evening outing to the pool - where one mother at the baby pool declared "what a perfect day", and... it was, I think (Lil and I ended ours on the deck, picking lettuce and playing Barbies - hubby, a true gaming kind of guy, got in some Wii time with his boys as they enjoyed their frozen treats from the pool - all before bedtime story and pjs). This morning, we are sipping hot chocolate (yep - summer hot chocolate - with cinnamon and real cocoa :-) and looking for Olivia in the camp photos again (quick digression here, Top Chef fans - Kelly Liken on this season is a Calvary Camp alum :-) - will probably register the whole family for the Run Around the Square (lower priced registration ends on 13 August so get those registrations in!). Uneventful (maybe a trip to my gym???).

Photo: Reminiscing.... this is me the day after I had Lilliana (who was almost 9 lbs!) at good old Magee Hospital here in Pitt - with all my little ones around me (though Milo looks a little like "mad milo") - can't believe how young Olivia looks - Enzo's "babyface" ;-).

Quick note: Blogher 2010 conference is today and tomorrow. Enjoy, all who are going!

COMPLETELY Random (from recipes to retail)...

Boots under $100 at Piperlime! I'm in!

Watched Vicky Cristina Barcelona last night and really liked it. If you've ever spent any time in Europe or in complicated relationships, you will relate. I am touch and go with Woody Allen films, but... this one - even with voiceover narrative - was really good (I mean, they're all good - some just speak to me more than others). Was it really 2008 when it came out?!?! I am soooo out of touch regarding movies. Anyway - made me feel better about my house full of half-finished canvases a la artist hubby - my coffee corner, constantly cluttered with spoons, french presses, sugar (all me :-) - my wardrobe and how some people are always referring to me as "bohemian" - my hot temper ;-). Worth a watch - definitely.

Checked camp photos for Olivia today. While we saw her friends playing basketball and doing yoga, we did not see her. Oh well - next round of photos.

Yesterday was a hugely productive day for me - I moved furniture, organized school paperwork, cleaned A LOT, and... somehow made it to Whole Foods where Enzo decided that he wanted to make fish for dinner - told the guy what we needed and everything. And we did end up with some yummy fish tacos for a late dinner (hubby busy at work - made me miss my workout, so... today, I need to be ON IT!): Marinated the fish (tilapia - very mild in case the boys wanted to eat some) briefly in a lime, chipotle pepper, salt and olive oil mixture - pan seared it - rolled it up in hand-rolled, organic flour tortillas with lime, hot sauce, lettuce, onion, cucumber, tomato and sour cream. So good.

Quick quest for input here.... I have begun to restrict my boys' media time. A good thing some days because it gives us a little more structure and discipline to our "lazy time". I have begun to notice, however, that they are obsessed with the Wii each morning when they get up, preventing me from watching the Today Show or from even reading and having any sort of quiet morning time in my space - the first floor - where I need to be productive. Selfish? I think not. I mean, it also causes fights and mean back talk. By contrast, though, Lilliana has become obsessed with some old-fashioned wooden pull toys I found while digging out yesterday. Interesting. So... my question: Do you restrict TV and / or media time? If so, how stringent are you? And... how do the kids react? You can email me if you like ;-).

Finally.... St. Beders (and I know some of you are still reading me this summer), our paperwork has arrived. Get it in ASAP! If you are lamenting the loss of summer, keep this in mind... we still have a couple of weeks left and schools like Woodland Hills Academy started today!

In closing, I'd like to share a bit of fluff.... that Lady Gaga made Vanity Fair's best-dressed list for being "original", which....is such a joke... given that she steals everything she says, does AND dresses in from Grace Jones and Madonna - who were doing her "schtick" years ago!

Quick note: The National is playing Pittsburgh on 25 Sept - get your tickets everyone - they are selling out!

Last quick note: Are you a Mad Men fan? If so, the 2010 casting call for a walk-on part is on.... get your photo in.... hopefully, the deadline hasn't passed. If so, you can still vote on those who DID get photos in.... until early Sept, I believe. Good luck :-).

And... I'm out. Happy, happy, everyone.

Quite a mix.

Of "my stuff" today, that is. This will be quick and painless. I've been thinking a lot lately, which actually freezes my brain instead of getting it to work more productively. Go figure. Anyway... Lil and I joined the family on the baseball outing yesterday. The plan was to divide and conquer (cuz we had 4 REALLY good seats that would thrill the boys and impress Olivia - for a good time had by all ;-), but... Lil's feelings were going to get hurt, and, truthfully, I was NOT in the mood to do more laundry. So we went and Lil did run from me and go into full tantrum mode most of the time but ... everyone got hats (and it freaks me out that hubby will pay $75 in hat money, but.... will refuse to buy food there - told the boys they HAD to take care of these hats cuz I have a sneaking suspicion that we've bought and lost others - today, they came downstairs wearing them, then... dutifully put them back on their little pegs in their room - they LISTENED - wow. Digressing...) and everyone got to run around and sit and eat fries and act silly - and watch the balls come flying at them over by third base - and got cotton candy... Fun for all but sweaty, frazzled Mommy who indulged in a milkshake post-game when we stopped for ice cream (and, yeah - REAL ice cream for me this time :-).

Yesterday, we also tried to do a photo shoot for a personal venture that we have in the works. Instead, in the planning stages, hubby and I argued over what defines creative - who was more competitive - ridiculous stuff - then it rained and foiled our plans anyway. Now... I'm feeling self-conscious about all the photos I take. I photograph the house a lot for my blog - for my, for lack of a much better work, scrapbooks, photos collages, etc. (documenting a life well-lived, which is noble, I think). I'm also documenting my fitness progress (as young dancers and gymnasts, we used to photograph each other as we improved on technique, etc. - why not implement that same motivation now? Anyway....), so... prompted by a dumpy, can't seem to suck in that post-baby gut yet photo (yeah - I know - it's been two years - time flies, K?), I had to show off my new muscles and much flatter stomach (photos for me, of course, though I will share some of the sillier and / or motivational ones with you if need be ;-). Again, starting to think my camera has become an obsession with me (or - maybe has been for years.......).

So ... Olivia at sleepover (Olivia B) .... house cool and calm .... Lil up and down last night, which is maddening. I think her summer schedule is a bit off - plus, if we do something exciting during the day, she gets very wound up - ALL NIGHT - and I find myself giving her milk, rearranging her covers, changing her pull-up, allowing her bits of banana or graham cracker if she really gets up and needs a little sleepy time routine to get her back down... Makes me tired and then she sleeps in too late...Any advice? Any "been there done that" and / or "nipped that in the bud" advice?!?!

Photo: Was leafing through a drawing pad the boys found in one of Olivia's old art bins, and... had thought it devoid of anything but random scribbles and yellowed edges, but... did find a drawing that my Mom, Olivia and I had done way back in 1998. So... of course, I saved it, and... in its honor have posted a photo of my Mom and I AND my girlies - all together (from the 4th of July weekend).

Hope you have some clarity to your day. I am muddled, having forgotten to pay a camp balance - forgotten a hair appointment - more... I am OUT of it. I think I've been focusing on odd things like the leaky fish tank (had to get new one), the fact that the little ones picked all my green tomatoes - ALL of them, so... no yummy just picked from the vine tomatoes for me for a while - if at all... that kind of stuff. On the bright side, all my Oakland Catholic forms are in (and for those of you going down that road soon, there are a lot and in many different places... :-).

In closing, here is Julia Child's Poulet au Porto recipe, which is soooo good (in the movie, Julie and Julia, it is the chicken with mushrooms, cream and port that Julie references). Give it a try. I think I may do it today :-).

Some "stuff"...

Danced to Juan de Marcos and the Afro-Cuban All-Stars last night. Really fun. Would suggest going if / when they come back.....

Heat wave continues.... Stay cool. Our AC is not doing well in this humidity - old system - old house - unrelenting heat. Anyone else having trouble? Supposed to end Sunday, so... that will feel better.

School uniforms already out in the stores if you're in the market.....

As you know, I love my Zoku Quick Pop Maker from Williams Sonoma. Nice way to beat the heat. Read reviews and decide for yourself here.

Lovin' our Urban Active Fitness membership - use it all the time - work out at least every other day. Getting good info. and feedback from friends who use the personal trainers too. Check it all out here.

Cliched, but... we all grill in the summer, so... check out some ideas from Bon Appetit.

Last bit - Oakland Catholic is having language placement testing next week. Olivia is doing Spanish - and... I know there are a couple of time slots. Also, incoming freshman (probably other grades too) need to go online to fill out some necessary forms - IN ADDITION to what we received in the mail. The first of the two new student orientation dates is next week too. Just fyi, all....

Have to mention this.... my poor Milo has to go to Children's for his annual bloodwork today (Nephrology apptmt. tomorrow - he has Stage 2 Chronic Kidney Disease - was born with the issue - doing fine though), so... keep him in your thoughts, but... more so - keep hubby and the poor lab tech doing the bloodwork in your foremost thoughts as well; if neither is wearing protective clothing, they may sustain some injuries.... Milo is a thrasher ;-).

End of the day.

One kid in shower - two in the bathtub - one at sports boot camp. Everyone fed. I'm not showered (or fed). Preparing movie and popcorn now after a long day out in the sun. Pool, tennis, running around with friends, riding bikes. What a day. Play date tomorrow plus the swim team, tennis drill in the am. Plan to squeeze in a workout. All good. What IS for dinner tonight anyway? Hubby on his way home.....

Keep in mind, I write this amid chaos. As we left this morning, we only got a portion of the breakfast dishes done - the kids pajamas hang on the banister - discarded tennis rackets litter the foyer - Lilliana brings every single toy from her bedroom down the stairs and... well... wherever she put them, that's where they stayed - I kicked my own flip flops off under my desk earlier as I bolted out of the house - the video camera that I was looking at (my b-day gift) is dismantled on my desk (I had 5 min. to look at it this am) - in the midst of looking for Enzo's school tennis medal (he was asking - horrified, I realized I did NOT know where it was), I rummaged through all the "filed" school papers in the dining room, creating a horrible mess (not to mention the piles of new high school forms and kindergarten stuff for the fall already lying there)... Basically, where it all sat this morning, it still sits. When the kids get home from the pool or school or whatever - they bolt 9,000 mph out the door looking for friends, a bike to ride, a walk to take, a bug to examine, and... I am, of course, right behind them.... Nothing gets done, but... well... the bugs, the walk, etc.

Happy evening hours, all!

Can't sleep.

Possibly a good thing this morning as I contemplate a workout at the gym.....

I worry (as you know). Sometimes, I am overwhelmed by bad family behavior (I don't like to see my kids hurt again and again - and I know that there is often nothing I can do about a family member and his / her issues - mental, personal, etc. - especially if it's a family I've married into and I may not know all the past baggage - but it still stings and ... can be frustrating), issues I needed to resolve with the kids during the day, guilt at not being more of a financial contributor to the family..... more. And.... I can't sleep. Warrants mentioning here that I have always been this way (and I think I have mentioned that before) - an insomniac since I was a kid (back then I worried about outgrowing my toys, disappointing my Mom, why certain people laughed at my new "wedge" haircut, etc.).

I do have to say that with the worry comes some good stuff too - remembering how Enzo got into bed with us early yesterday morning to cuddle (lay on the floor outside our door waiting for us - poor guy) - Milo and how proud he is of his swimming progress and how cute he looked floating on his "noodle" in the pool yesterday - Lil Lil and how I found her playing Barbies by herself on the deck, wanting to eat her dinner out there, perfectly happy alone - how Olivia hung out with us a bit last night, watching silly movies, talking about her day and her friends - and how hubby rubs my head and back when I can't sleep...

Meant to say happy birthday to my brother earlier this week. When I contacted him, he was not feeling well - allergies, sinus infection - something. When I spoke to my Mom yesterday (and all is well there aside from a bird who has built a nest outside her front door and swoops at her all the time), she was going to make him a birthday dinner so assured me that our plans to visit (foiled by Olivia's field hockey clinic today at her old lacrosse field, Winchester Thurston) would be best moved anyway. My birthday is Sunday.

Anyway, if I want to get a pre-6 am start to the gym, I need to give you my rundown....

As you know, I love Olive Juice kids clothes. Big sale here (and I do mean big - when they mark down, they mark everything, including $60 girls dresses, down to $10).

Found this web site recently. Kids clothing, household accessories - started by a Mom. Again, I would give credit regarding where I found this, but... I cruise so many sites and get so many referrals, I often forget.

And... how 'bout that bad call that cost the US the win (they tied) in the World Cup game against Slovenia (found the announcer's nod to the 80,000 + Slovenians in Cleveland, Ohio funny - particularly because I am from the area and my Dad's family is of Slavic heritage - varied). Anyway, it was a game to watch. Read here.

I'm in love with vegan California Suncakes. Not many people are, but I have always loved them and recently rekindled my relationship at a local coffeeshop, Coffee tree Roasters. Try them - you'll like them. Might best be eaten post-workout since they are a little dense.

And, finally, my friend's friend's company here (got that?). She had this funky idea to put area codes and the city you live in, come from ,etc. on t-shirts, and.... finally, the other day, someone wore one on tv (minor celeb - Elizabeth Hasselbeck from The View, but still....) and now she is inundated with calls. Good for her! Check her out.

Thinking of friends today who are hiking the Rachel Carson Trail. 35 miles in less than 15 hours. They are better than I am.... Interesting background on Rachel here (really interesting - as is the case with all that I've mentioned here... worth a look).

What are you all getting hubbies, brothers, Dads for Father's Day? I'm only shopping for hubby and may just do a new gym bag and get some of our cool urban family photos from a month or two ago framed for him, which.... brings me to the photos of the day....

My boys and my girls (and I'm just realizing that due to preschool and toddler fickle-ness, we did not get one of the four of them together.... whoops) photographed by Libby (who has moved - sorry Pittsburghers....).

A near perfect day and a request for help.

So yesterday was great (just did frozen waffles and some fruit in the am - don't judge me ;-) - tired of weekend food clean-up :-). Olivia served mass for the last time (so a wee bit sad). Me and Lil went and, though Lil acted up a little bit, I saw some friends there, it was a pretty day, I got some time with just my girls. We shopped Trader Joe's afterwards - took a tour of our beautiful new gym, Urban Active Fitness - Olivia got her photo ID, we sampled smoothies, checked out the babysitting area, talked to a personal trainer, etc. We brought everyone lunch home, chatted with the neighbors then headed to the pool for a couple of hours of swimming (Olivia opted out but did have brownies baked when we got home) - then... home to grill carne asada with fresh tortillas, homemade guacamole, cool chopped English cucumber, jasmine rice, chopped red onion and buttery bib lettuce fresh from the farm (I opted for a veggie option - my carnivores loved the grilled meat). Late evening, we watched The Next Food Network Star. See - it does NOT take that much to make me happy :-).

I'm dragging a bit this morning. Lil was restless last night (mosquito bites, I think) - Milo was doing his "I'm overly tired so I can't sleep" thing (up until midnight!) and something woke Enzo in the middle of the night, and he was confused and thought I should put Toy Story back on for him (from way earlier in the evening), so... I was up and down all night. Lil sometimes needs a cup of milk to get back to sleep - Milo had to use the bathroom - Enzo was "loud talking" like it was the middle of the day... Anyway - up early - hubby to gym - boys watching Noggin and playing the little piano in their room. Lil up and cranky but went back to sleep - Olivia off to swim team. Boys currently demanding vanilla milk, waffles and the transformer that they left with their water squirters in the water table last night. Next order of business... COFFEE!!! Though... on the bright side today - I DO think I get my van back from the body shop (crippling not to have transportation).

Above all, this summer, I'm on a mission to make my kids more self-sufficient. I find that, if I don't pay attention, I will consistently be the one who fetches toys that the boys have left upstairs - become a short order cook for all the kids who eat different things at different hours - change shirts at their request because they've gotten sticky or dirty or wet - pick up toys that they spilled themselves - give in to fickle preschoolers, whining for yet another toy because the one I just ran the stairs for was not good enough - fetching lunch THEN a drink THEN "dessert" THEN more lunch because they're still hungry... I mean some of this, a mother does - ya know? BUT ... I should not have to run the stairs 10X while able-bodied preschoolers lounge waiting for games and toys to be brought to them - I should not have to forgo my own lunch to make ANOTHER for my army of picky eaters - I should not have to pick up discarded sippy cups filled with juice residue everyday from all over the house - I should not have to give up my bedroom to kids who don't like the movie that is on in their room and THEN have to give up the family room because they now want to play Wii; there are days that I do not have even one corner of the house to myself (again, I realize some of this comes with the territory, but...). And... these things are not one time issues.... they are ongoing and consistent realities in my day. One day, I recall not having even 10 min. to myself without a food, clothing, toy, bed making, fight break up or other request. I got NOTHING done. Laundry sat half-folded on the bed - dinner was burned - my lunch sat on the counter half-eaten all afternoon - I was half-dressed all day..... Just no way to live. Add to that the fact that my hubby is a clothes piler (this am, I watched him try to pick through the 6 ft. pile of discarded clothing for a pair of jeans to wear, obviously realizing that he had thrown all of them out of his closet and onto his "piling chair' in our bedroom) - my middle schooler puts ALL of her dishes in the sink all the time - the baby is clingy right now - the boys fight and need to be occupied constantly..... This will change. I promise you - by the end of the summer, I will have a more functional, less stressful household (for me anyway ;-). I mean, sometimes I am actually ashamed that I let them dictate my timeline - as I race out of the house in pajamas because they see their friends and IMMEDIATELY want to play outside - I hang up with a friend because one of them needs his juice RIGHT NOW and is conjuring a tantrum to prove it - or give up valuable task time because they have decided they can no longer get dressed by themselves and need me to do it, so... later, when I should be enjoying their company, playing with them, spending 5 min. on my own hobby, I am frustrated, scrambling to get things done, yelling at them or others..... I guess this is all part of my "mission organization" this summer. Much needed changes will be made :-).

Photos: Some images from last summer - picnic at my brother, David's, house - hanging in historic Peninsula, Ohio with my Mom (near her house - near one of my old high schools, actually) - Olivia and pals, Kelly and Olivia, at a swim meet last year - funny picture of Enzo in Daddy's "vacation hat" (though he thinks he looks like Indiana Jones) - Lil Lil with ice cream in her cool, sparkly black onesie by Childish Clothing .... Looking forward to more fun this year :-).

Haven't heard from a lot of you lately - email, FB, here, etc. What do you have planned this summer? I'm interested..... And... any suggestions for making the fam more self-sufficient? There are days that I am STUMPED. Good thoughts for a good week, all.

Countdown to Mother's Day

Enzo gave me a lovely little clay pendant necklace yesterday - accompanied by a card "with letters in it" :-). Both boys and I indulged in a couple of self-portraits on the deck (and, of course, we got out the handprints that Milo had already given me). We love our self-portraits.

Went to the school fund-raising dinner last night and had a great time. Talked a lot to other 8th grade parents also experiencing the last bus ride, the last full day, the last lunch in the cafeteria, the last day in the art room (and the art teacher was a new teacher when this class was in kindergarten so she is getting weepy too) - sniff. Olivia and her beloved St. Bede.

Got our photos back from Libby. They look amazing. I, of course, never look good in photos, but... I am glad that everyone else turned out FANTASTIC! So happy. This really does erase the fact that cute photos we had taken last year were lost by the photographer before we got prints - the fact that I never have time to print and group the photos I take, etc.

We have decided not to do the Race for the Cure because our little ones are too much to manage these days, but... will make a donation and... will encourage you now... to go - register or cheer people on, and... while you're at it, check out this list of other things to do 'round town this weekend.

Today? Well... swim class went well - Enzo put his face in the water, a good thing. Lilliana is splashing around in the puddles in the backyard right now, "helping" Daddy plant (having recovered from her first REAL scraped knee yesterday - she came running down the sidewalk in her Kate Mack ballerina tutu bathing suit, crying :-(. We have a lacrosse game away today (and we are driving Olivia and friends). Milo told me he's going to be my "super special helper" again today ... Editing / ghost-writing project going really well now - we've really hit our stride (designer and I) - the end product is going to be great!

Indulging in one piece of crusty bread with fresh mozzarella and homemade marinara today. Happy to report that I am staying on workout schedule and .... the whole family has joined a new gym - Urban Active Fitness at Bakery Square - childcare, classes (I miss my Pilates), shopping area - happy, happy, joy, joy ....

Photo: Olivia (photographed by Libby Jones)

Bigtime workout plan starts today!

And I mean it. No more treats and lots of cardio and weights. AND that's all I got today ;-). Well.... that and May Crowning at school (Olivia all dressed up :-), gymnastics, fund-raising sponsor forms need to go out,in the home stretch in document editing, gymnastics, lacrosse, handwriting practice, potty training, yard work, home improvement, etc. All good.